therealpm: (Thinking)
[personal profile] therealpm
I will be appearing in a documentary by the BBC about the narrow educational background of our current government. It will be presented by Andrew Neil.

No capering involved, Alastair. Watch and learn.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Ah ahm naaht puut arn t'urt fur yeh amuusement.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
Strmpfftpftmph.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Too much? I can't say I ever paid a great deal of attention to what Hague was saying, and even less to how he said it.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
*wipes away tears*

N-no, it was brilliant. Like reggae being played backwards through a pork pie.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
*quizzical look*

*drinks tea to hide aforementioned expression*

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
I'm serious, have you ever considered voiceover work?

*produces hip flask*

*surreptitiously adds milk to coffee*

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Reading my book was quite enough.

Stop that! You're not the milkybar kid.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
The difference being that I'd pay good money to hear it read in whatever the hell your vocal chords just invented.

But I am strong and tough! And frequently silence crowded saloons with my presence!

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
How dare you mock my Hartlepool northern roots.

Mmmhmm- I suspect as everyone therin is busy wondering whether there's been a sudden a gas leak. You can be rather... pungent.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
You're about as "northern" as Champagne Charlie ordering a vegan sushi platter on his iPhone.

Yahweh's cunt, we're doing fart jokes now? Remind me never to take your claims of taste and sophistication seriously ever again.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
I represented the people of Hartlepool for many years.

Who said anything about flatulence? I was referring to your general lack of anything resembling personal hygeine.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
Don't retaliate don't retaliate don't retaliate

Apologies, Arthur Scargill.

I'll have you know that my natural musk has buttered many a parsnip in its time.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
I'm going to pretend to take that literally, because the notion of what it could mean euphemistically is likely to put me off my dinner.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
Whatever it takes to sublimate those raging hormones.

Any road, I'd better be moving on, got to fit in at least some prep for a bit of slap and tickle with that suited-up choirboy Mitchell tonight. I'll leave you to turn on, tune in and mock relentlessly.

Ta for the coffee - and if you manage to leave my brain alone for the next eight hours, the fucking milkybars are on moi.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Begone, demon. Back to the pit from whence ye came.

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 03:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
*exits with a theatrical flourish*

(no subject)

Date: 2011-01-27 02:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] c4mpb3llcl4r3t.livejournal.com
And for the record, I smell divine.
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