AV explained

[therealpm]

Comments

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

Text from 07*********

If youcould tell the ptess to leave off my wofe, i's bs grateful. She can wear whatever fja likes. Just like Sam.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

Text received from 07### ######

How much champagne have you drunk, George?

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

Text from 07*********

Enouuh. You should vd heee.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

Text received from 07### ######

...where precisely are you?

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

Text from 07*********

Party. Garden. Lost Frances. Fmund wine.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

*sends a text 'Stay exactly where you are and don't move.'*

*scrabbles into a three piece suit and suitably muted tie*

*scrawls a circle in chalk on the floor*

*disappears from room, reappears behind George*

Sssh...

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

Bloody hell!

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

*rolls over*
*pokes snoring lump onto side to reduce noise levels*

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

*rolls over to snore in pokey man's ear*

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

*attempts to roll away, but realises would fall off bed*

*shoves head under pillow instead*

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

*flings arm out to cover Peter*

*buries down contentedly*

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

*Is not noticeably pleased, given the warmth of the day, to be covered by a smugly snug chancellor, still somewhat stained with sweat and stale champagne.*

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

*grunts*

*jerks up, eyes wide*

Don't kiss the panda!

[themachine0001.livejournal.com]

.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

Yes?

[themachine0001.livejournal.com]

HE IS HERE.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

With such observational acuity, I'm not sure you need the upgrade to quartz lenses.

[themachine0001.livejournal.com]

FATHER, HE WILL ONLY TAKE UP OXYGEN WHICH COULD BE BETTER USED ELSEWHERE AND I FIND HIS CONTINUAL RESPIRING OFFENSIVE.

ALSO YOU AGAIN BLOCKED MY OMNIVIEW FROM INSPECTING THIS ROOM OVER THE HOURS OF LAST NIGHT AND I HAD TO INHABIT THE AIR CONDITIONING JUST TO ENSURE YOU HAD NOT DIED TRAGICALLY DURING THE NIGHT.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

..and yet he has singularly failed to so much as attempt to transmogrify my person into forms canine or feline; nor has he evidenced any desire to do so.

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

Text from 07*********

Will I be permitted the return of my bed today or must I purchase a new one? I'm going shopping anyway as every time I touch my lamp, cutlery, kettle or taps your bloody jumpedup calculator electrocuted me.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

Text received from 07### ######

Buying replacements will hardly prevent that, George. The Machine will simply confer a minor electrostatic charge upon your purchases.

Your bed is in the back garden. I expect it's slightly soggy, but you might want to get it inside before the next bout of rain.

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

Text from 07*********

You realise that, as its 'master', you do, in fact, have a level of control over your ridiculous contraption. You could actually stop it electrocuting me every time I attempt to switch a light on.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

Text received from 07### ######

Indeed I could.

As it happens, The Machine is currently down for routine maintenance and is unable to electrify anything.

[ch4ncellor.livejournal.com]

Text from 07*********

And long may it stay that way.

[therealpm.livejournal.com]

Text received from 07### ######

Repairs proceeding rather more rapidly than I expected. Enjoy the next three hours or so.

George, you haven't been having any odd dreams lately, have you?