Deep in the Westminster Vaults
Feb. 19th, 2012 11:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
therealpm*Surveys the meticulously painted runes required for a meso-scale trans-location, sigils that are now useless and beginning to smell due to the wards: newly strengthened by Bercow's return.*
*attempts to cast a cleaning charm*
*after sheltering from the haphazard whirlwind of soap-suds and bleach, decides to try cleaning it up manually*
Machine, I require tea.
...and also some sort of cleaning implement
*ponders*
*rearranges the runes in one corner to form a slightly smaller summoning circle*
*steps back and mouths a few words until what appears to be a very trim racing broom appears*
*smirks and begins to clean up the mess*
*attempts to cast a cleaning charm*
*after sheltering from the haphazard whirlwind of soap-suds and bleach, decides to try cleaning it up manually*
Machine, I require tea.
...and also some sort of cleaning implement
*ponders*
*rearranges the runes in one corner to form a slightly smaller summoning circle*
*steps back and mouths a few words until what appears to be a very trim racing broom appears*
*smirks and begins to clean up the mess*
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Meanwhile, at the Bercow household...
Date: 2012-02-19 11:32 am (UTC)That's much better, boys - wait, is that a piece of Lego I spy hiding under that teddy?
Percect, boys. You've done very well indeed! You grab your safety gear and I'll go and grab the brooms.
*Wanders to storage space where the brooms are kept*
There are the smaller ones... now, mine should be.... should be here-ish...
*Moves boxes out of the way and is faced with an empty broom stand*
...
*Checks for any indication of who could have taken the broom - no foot prints in the dust, no scuff marks...*
*Checks for spells*
...PETER BENJAMIN MANDELSON!
Re: Meanwhile, at the Bercow household...
Date: 2012-02-19 11:41 am (UTC)What's that, Machine?
Oh has he?
Hmmmm, prepare the wards. We can't stop him dropping by, but it's entirely possible to prevent him lobbing spells about like a five year old with firecrackers.
No, Machine, I wasn't referring to Freddie, don't be absurd.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 11:58 am (UTC)Peter, what in the name of Merlin have you done with my-
*Sees broom leaning against the wall, the bristles bent out of shape and covered in dirt*
*Lets out a very high pitched noise*
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 12:03 pm (UTC)What the devil...
Oh, the broom. Yes, it's over there. You can have it back now, I've finished sweeping up for the moment.
*waves hand dismissively and turns back to cup of tea*
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 12:11 pm (UTC)*He picks up the broom and stares at it for a moment*
*John makes his way back towards the exit, silently, still looking at the broom*
*He turns around to looks at Peter*
...I can't take the boys flying, now.
*Bercow leaves*
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 12:13 pm (UTC)John,
don't be absurd. It just needs a bit of a wash.
-Peter
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 12:15 pm (UTC)Peter,
That thing is not safe for flying. Racing brooms are delicately balanced. If I even tried to... It's not safe to fly. I'll have to get it seen to properly.
John
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 12:22 pm (UTC)John,
you are making a mountain out of a molehill. It is nothing a quick run under the tap cannot fix. However, if you find yourself utterly incapable of removing dirt from a broomstick, then by all means borrow mine for the time being.
-Peter
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 12:52 pm (UTC)Peter,
Thank you for the offer, but I think you've done enough today.
John
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-19 12:53 pm (UTC)John,
anytime.
-Peter
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:21 pm (UTC)You owe me £48.71.
And you owe the British people £1.1 trillion.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:23 pm (UTC)Nonsense, dear boy.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:27 pm (UTC)I'm the Chancellor of the Exchequer. Do you really think I wouldn't check my bills?
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:29 pm (UTC)Doing so would display considerably more care and attention to detail with regard to fiscal matters than has been evidenced by your chancellorship thus far.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:32 pm (UTC)And yet were, for example, Russia charging me for their defense budget, I'd probably notice. Just as I'll notice when it's your phone number at the top of the paper.
Now, how do you plan to pay me?
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:42 pm (UTC)There is an implicit and unjustifiable assumption in that message. Do see if you can work out what it is.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:48 pm (UTC)That you have multiple options? Oh but you do. There's cash, there's online banking - I know it's something that might worry you but I don't think they're likely to trace us - or you could buy me dinner tonight.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:51 pm (UTC)I might cook you dinner tonight, provided you're in the mood for stir-fry.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:53 pm (UTC)You're going to have to do better than that.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 03:56 pm (UTC)Fine, pudding as well.
Now sort the thing out and make it less expensive for me to irritate Bercow.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 04:01 pm (UTC)It's so simple Luke could do itI'll make it less expensive, but you have to take me to dinner or supply some bloody excellent wine at yours as well as the pudding.
And if it's Eton Mess - so help you.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 04:03 pm (UTC)I always have excellent wine.
Damn.Gooseberry fool?(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 04:07 pm (UTC)What are you trying to imply, Mandelson?
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 04:11 pm (UTC)Nothing dear boy, nothing at all.
So you'll be here about 7:30 then?
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 04:17 pm (UTC)7:45.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 04:28 pm (UTC)That depends entirely on whether I choose to translocate you or not.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 07:28 pm (UTC)I may be late tonight. Perhaps by several hours... I can only apologise. I'll flay a SpAd for you.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-20 07:44 pm (UTC)I am decidedly unimpressed.