therealpm

Of course not, it still has at least 4 years, 4 months to go.

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A lot can happen in that time period...

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Oh, I agree. Students, for example, could incur over £9,180,000,000 collective debt between 2012 and the next general election, not including loans for rent/general maintenance.

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...Just to clarify, this is students in general? Not... a singular student made more terrifying by your use of the plural?

If it's the second, then that explains a lot

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Tell me, do you often use the word 'collective' when referring to a single person?

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I'm an economist, Mr Mandelson, not an English student. You'd have to look at my partner for that.

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As an economist, you should at least be able to distinguish between a singlar and a plural, or is that sort of maths far too advanced?

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I'm extremely capable at maths, Mr Mandelson, and I resent you suggesting otherwise.

Anyway, where have you been recently? I was hoping you'd moved away... no such luck I see.

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I've been... occupied... with other matters.

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Not illegal ones, I trust? Only I'd hate for another Labour politician to fall foul of the law...

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Speaking of which, how is the Parliamentary inquiry going, by the way? Any news yet?

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I'm told it'll be any day now. You know how long Parliamentary business can take.

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Oh, they can be remarkably rapid when it suits them.

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Unfortunately, this time!

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Don't encourage Mandelson to look at me! Have you looked into those ~~pits of evil~~ eyes?

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~~They never made me a demon eyes poster.~~

My eyes are perfectly normal, Lundie.

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~~I wouldn't be concerned. There are quite the high number of interpretations~~

Of course they are. Apologies.

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~~Interpretation? The first one's a photo from the last cabinet meeting.~~

How are you keeping?

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Not too shabby - working hard, disappointed at the results last night. I imagine you're ~~smug~~ pleased?

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Certainly, it would be very odd were I not pleased with not only a Labour victory, but a 30 fold increase in Labour's majority.

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Let's bear in mind that my party increased its vote share and brought ease to your campaign by, well, possessing a measure of power.

And let us not forget our mutual victory here - that the BNP lost its deposit

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The slight gain by the Lib Dems was, you must admit, due to tactical voting by conservatives.

An excellent outcome! ~~For which Mr Farron owes me a rather large favour...~~

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As if Labour is unscathed by tactical voting...

~~An outcome for which I must congratulate you~~

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I would say we emerged from this election battle completely unscathed, reinvigorated even.

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I spoke, not of this election, but others

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Mere speculation on the part of the BBC.

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We saw them saying it at the doorstep in marginal seats. It was on the Socialist Appeal's front page. It was on your soft Lib Dem target election literature

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In that case, I would be justified in calling this leaflet indicative of the overall tone of the Lib Dem campaign and party. Or shall we agree that leaflets for candidates may, at times, deviate from standard party line?

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