therealpm: (annoyed)
Just to be clear, I have been far too busy over the past few months to have had anything to do with the recent IT problems. That said, had the proposals contained in my report been implemented in full, I am confident this situtation would not have occurred.

Edit: It seems (belated) birthday wishes are in order for Baroness D'Souza. Congratulations etc.

Edit 2: Fuck off, Kinnock Junior
therealpm: (smug)
*Peter dials Fiona's phone number, but just gets through to voicemail. He tries the landline, but soon hears the beep of the answerphone. Clearly she's not in. He leaves a message.*

Hi, Fiona. Alastair's a little indisposed and won't be able to come home tonight. Nothing to worry about, but he'll be staying here for a bit until he feels better. I'll send him back over tomorrow. Hope you're well- you've got my number if you need to call.

Lots of love,
therealpm: (smug)
*Peter skims through Hansard. He's been far too busy plotting revenge attending to House of Lords business to watch the debates today, but with the statement on the equal marriage consultation and Treasury questions, it seems reasonable to invest a little time digging out the choicer quotes. Especially if he's expected to turn up to the Lords for those sort of things.

Most of the debate is pretty predictable, but towards the end Bercow takes a point of order. Most odd; there's still a statement to go.

As he reads through the exchange, the corners of his mouth begin to turn up, until by the end he's sporting a full blown smirk. It's not just that Osborne was made to sit there and be reprimanded for his disregard of parliamentary procedure, but that it's done in such a way as to make Bercow's dislike for the man painfully obvious. Peter is reminded of nothing so much as Jack's tendency to growl, and even nip, when he spots a long-lens camera. A sort of dogged, over-protective loyalty that's as endearing as it is amusing (he buries the pang of resentment he still feels every time he sees someone mocking his George. It's a tenacious habit but one he is determined to break). He gets out his phone.

Text from 07### ######


interesting performance with Osborne yesterday. I'm touched.

therealpm: (Mr Bond)
*Peter wakes early, still bouyed up by the election results and heads downstairs for a cup of tea and a yoghurt. His phone buzzes as the kettle boils. An update from The Machine.

Sipping his tea slowly, he scrolls through the results and nearly spills it everywhere when he reaches The Machine's conclusions, which have been carefully bolded so he can't possibly miss them. A quick enquiry confirms that the results have been double, triple and quadruple checked- there is no uncertainty.

Grinning, he types out a text message.*

Text from 07### ######


your presence is required. ASAP.


*He sips his tea again, considering how to procede. A little background music wouldn't go amiss.*
therealpm: (Default)
*Peter sits back in his chair and smirks smugly at the stack of papers in front of him. John's gift of a TV had been a greater boon than he'd expected. In his panic, John hadn't placed any wards on the TV at all, and so it had been a simple matter for Peter to 'adapt' the TV and the remote control to allow him to communicate with The Machine via a tele-text style interface. Peter did wonder whether anyone would notice, given teletext had been cancelled for a while, but apparently it appeared innocuous enough to pass under his guards' radars, and now, the fruits of The Machine's labours are stacked neatly before him on the desk. He hasn't had time to do more than frantically scribble down notes, but even this preliminary reading has suggested several new ways in which the potion might be improved, or at least rendered less likely to kill him; and who knows, if he survives this, he might even be able to get a paper out of it.  Grinning with anticipation, he picks up the first sheet and begins to work.*
therealpm: (smug)
*Sitting in the back of a vehicle with blacked out windows, huddled up once more in a hoodie far too broad for him, Peter looks across at Alastair and smirks.  Alastair thinks they're going for the equivalent of a jog around the park, and Peter has been careful not to indicate otherwise.  Today is going to be horrible, but watching Alastair slowly lose the will to live is going to make it utterly worth it.*
therealpm: (annoyed)
My Hero
It is time that I finally leave frontline politics completely and instead devote my time to a far more worthy cause:
turning this journal into a tribute page for the greatest Lord ever to grace the upper chamber.
I am also jealous of his hair and will spend the next year trying to emulate it perfectly.

Don't turn my MPs into animals again, Peter, or this will be just the start. - John
You realise, John, that this means war?


Oct. 17th, 2011 05:43 pm
therealpm: (Thinking)
*picks up blackberry*

*scrolls through menu to check messages*


I didn't know Cameron had-



Well isn't this amusing.

*Tosses a pinch of powder into the grate and steps through to the laboratory of The Machine*

Machine, I require a complete facsimile of this.

*Holds up blackberry*

Software and data will do for now, but I need a physical version by tomorrow.


An exact copy- nothing less.
therealpm: (Default)
I find it somewhat ironic that Cameron should announce the forcible opening up of public service provision to private sector companies on the day that Southern Cross has folded. The man's timing is impeccable. Were he not being crucified in absentia by the commons and the popular press over his failure to disassociate himself from Murdoch with sufficient alacrity and zeal, I have no doubt that this would be considered a major faux pas.  As it is, he's made so many in the past 14 months that this one barely registers.
therealpm: (smug)
Once again, I believe I have been proven correct.

It is a pity that Cameron's most able spokesman is currently unable to help him. From what I've seen thus far, he rather needs the assistance.


May. 21st, 2011 08:44 pm
therealpm: (Default)
First the IMF, now the WTO. What other acronymed organisations will the Guardian suggest? MoD? RBS? WWF?
therealpm: (Default)
A change of politicians does not appear to necessitate a change in policy.

I find it interesting that the coalition government accuses Labour of lacking policies whilst simultaneously adopting them.
therealpm: (Default)
Dan Jarvis (Lab) 14,724 : 60.8%
Jane Collins (UKIP) 2,953 : 12.19%
James Hockney (C) 1,999 : 8.25%
Enis Dalton (BNP) 1,463 : 6.04%
Tony Devoy (Ind) 1,266 : 5.23%
Dominic Carman (LD) 1,012 : 4.18%
Kevin Riddiough (Eng Dem) 544 : 2.25%
Howling Laud Hope (Loony) 198 : *
Michael Val Davies (Ind) 60 : *

Lab majority 11,771: Turnout 36.5%
therealpm: (Plotting)
Other than the minor amusement of dispatching the unfounded criticisms of a few unwise Tories, today has been rather tedious. Distracted myself by watching the cricket. It's surprisingly amusing when one takes a more active role in determining the outcome of the match.

Ankle update: cast itches. Incessantly.

Machine Log Book )


Feb. 22nd, 2011 02:45 pm
therealpm: (I don't think so)
A gentle reminder to certain people to avoid making accusations without proof. Better to stick to stick to substantiated scandals.


Feb. 21st, 2011 02:53 pm
therealpm: (Default)
I really shouldn't allow The Machine to run unattended overnight. It seems to have become infested with these little monsters:

Transported most of them to Venezuala. An arch-mage there still hasn't returned my grimoire; perhaps a few demon-frogs will refresh his memory?
therealpm: (Default)
Parliament is often accused of being old, antiquated, or out of touch; so it's wonderful to see that at least one member of the Commons is willing to modernise.  Step forward, Bercow.   Your new, prohibition era 'greaser' hairstyle is wonderfully fresh, coming straight from the 1920s.

Cut for those for whom 'grease' is *not* the word. )
therealpm: (Pleased)
All in all an excellent and informative week with some significant labour victories and the prospect of more to come.

Progress on The Machine: sucessfully uninstalled previous system.  Considering switch to germanic rune set; elder futhark rather unwieldy.

Now where's everybody got to....?
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