therealpm: (Bercow incoming)
[personal profile] therealpm
Received confirmation that I have been removed from the no-fly list. Welcome news, albeit delivered within one of the most patronising letters I have ever had the misfortune to receive.

Corfu beckons.

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Date: 2012-12-15 07:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wllmhague.livejournal.com
Welcome back to the free world, Lord Mandelson. All of us in the Government live in polite terror of your great political skill. I am glad to see you back in our arena, and pleased to hear of your recovery. Modern science, when allied with the magical arts, is a wondrous thing.

Do let me know if there are any lingering effects of your experience that I can help to redress. If you find any red tape at the Home Office, I would be happy to have a word in certain kitten-heeled ears.

Theresa will learn not to lock certain ginger liberals in their offices, or my name isn't William Jefferson Hague.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Indeed, it is pleasant to no longer have one's liberty arbitrarily curtailed.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wllmhague.livejournal.com
*William rolls his eyes.*

While I am happy to see you back in the land of the living, Lord Mandelson, I hardly think the erstwhile curtailment could fairly be described as "arbitrary". It was requested by DEFRA, an agency which I would remind you was given an expanded responsibility for supernatural creatures and their welfare by the last Labour Government. You had thirteen years to change things if you were unsatisfied with how they were established.

*Quarreling during the Christmas season is unkind, however, and William tries not to be unkind to forcibly retired spin doctors.*

If you're unsatisfied with how the Foreign Office dealt with the situation, I would be happy to consider a complaint, although I imagine DEFRA might be the first destination for such a complaint.

In any event, happy holidays. Take care of yourself.

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From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com - Date: 2012-12-15 10:59 pm (UTC) - Expand

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Date: 2012-12-15 09:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thetwitterqueen.livejournal.com
Yay! That's great news! How about you and me go to Ibiza one of these days, huh? It's time to celebrate!!

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Will you let John know, or shall I?

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thetwitterqueen.livejournal.com
You can if you want to! But I'm happy to. Without getting into too many details, we're doing very well at the moment (!) and anyways I think he's about ready for a little quiet time by himself. It's been quite busy around here lately! :DDDDDD

Anyway, BRING YOUR PARTY HAT.

Do you own a party hat?

BRING YOUR DANCING SHOES.

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Date: 2012-12-15 09:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foxtrot-vince.livejournal.com
Congratulations, Lord Mandelson.

You think they're patronising to you? You don't have to work with them!

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Thank you.

You had your chance to avoid doing so...

I may send a draft of a paper detailing the modifications to the cure your way soon, unless you have something written already?

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foxtrot-vince.livejournal.com
Now, now, you know as well as I do, even if you won't admit it, that the Liberal Democrats have done quite a lot to moderate the Tories' Tory natures. As difficult as they are, I'd rather work with them and put up with all the small indignities and large annoyances, if that means that I have the opportunity to make a difference in the world.

I'm afraid I've been working on my day job recently, but I plan to use part of the Christmas holiday to write up my notes. A draft from you would be most useful, thank you.

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Date: 2012-12-15 09:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nextliberalpm.livejournal.com
It's good to hear that all the paperwork has been taken care of. I think "patronising" is the default language of the Sir Humphreys of this world, but at least it's over now and you can start travelling again.

You wouldn't happen to know where a few of the BIS files you were working on have vanished to, would you? They weren't with the stack of files you gave back. Perhaps they decided to have a holiday as well. If you could track them down for me, I'd be eternally grateful. Otherwise, I suppose I'd get so worried I'd just have to have a word with Paddy.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
I'm afraid not. The room was emptied rather hurriedly, so it is possible that they may have been mistakenly packed away somewhere. I will make enquiries.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nextliberalpm.livejournal.com
Ah, I see. Your reputation precedes you, so I'm sure your enquiries will be completed with your well-known professionalism and speed. I look forward to their result.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msdeputyspeaker.livejournal.com
Excellent.

*Dawn feels a little guilty about the whole affair, even though she doesn't think she should. She did what was right, and her fears were entirely justified. Just because it's turned out for the best doesn't mean that the far more likely possibility that it could have all gone tits up is now invalid.

Still, she hopes, for entirely practical reasons, that Mandelson doesn't hate her now. Not that she has to deal with the Lords on a regular basis, but she is a Deputy Speaker. You never know when it might come up.*

Enjoy your travels.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Thank you.

Enjoy your retirement after the next election.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msdeputyspeaker.livejournal.com
*Fuck.

He does hate her.

Dawn shrugs. Ah well. Hazards of the trade.

There's work to be done.*

(no subject)

Date: 2012-12-15 10:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] defrainspector.livejournal.com
*Molly can't help beaming. It's nothing to do with her, really, it's all to do with the amazing man himself and his refusal to give up, assisted by his support team, but still, he's her very first success story, and it makes her almost cry with relief. It's possible. It's freaking possible.*

Congratulations on having the paperwork filed, Lord Mandelson. The wheels of state run slowly, but they do come through in the end. As you know, you are cleared at DEFRA as well.

*Molly hesitates. Should she point him to people of change organisations? She shouldn't really. She's supposed to be impartial; if her bosses found out about her membership in some of her groups, she'd be called on the carpet in no time.

And would this man even want to become involved in advocacy or activism? He's had an incredibly difficult time; she was there for part of it, and that was only the physical component. She, who has not his experience, can long for his help and his knowledge, but she can't demand it. It isn't her place or her right.

If he wants to become involved, Molly finally decides reluctantly, he has the skills to find the ways himself. She won't overstep herself, not now and not here.*

If ever you have any questions about your recent experiences, you have my number.

Godspeed, Lord Mandelson.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-12-15 10:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Thank you. It is good to have the matter at an end.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] defrainspector.livejournal.com
*Well, there's her answer. She sighs. In his own time, Molly, in his own time, she reminds herself.

She logs off and goes to bed, leaving Peter Mandelson to live his own life in his own way.*

(no subject)

Date: 2012-12-15 10:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bigalcampbell.livejournal.com
Excellent news! Go forth, be some other country's problem for a change.

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Oh indeed, because you've been so terribly helpful to this one?

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Date: 2012-12-15 10:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bigalcampbell.livejournal.com
I'm glad you recognise that. But unusually, this isn't about me, Peter - it's about your chance to start afresh somewhere far, far, far away. I've heard the South Pole is very peaceful this time of year.

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Date: 2012-12-16 05:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bamfbercow.livejournal.com
Text from 078## ######

Peter,

I hear you're running away to Ibiza with my wife. I don't have any reason to worry, do I?

-John

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Date: 2012-12-16 05:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Text from 07### ######

John,

no, our relationship is strictly platonic.

-Peter

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Date: 2012-12-16 07:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thetwitterqueen.livejournal.com
Peter, dear, I'm afraid I can't go to Ibiza. John...well. I can't go.

*She doesn't know why she's not explaining everything to Peter. She's still boiling about the fact that John is basically holding her children hostage to force her to stay at home instead of taking a two-day holiday with her friend who she thinks needs one.

But marriage isn't just for the good times, and a - perhaps misplaced - sense of loyalty keeps her mouth shut.*

John tells me you're coming over for Christmas. We'll be so glad to see you. And I'll be sure to bring out the party hats for you then.
Edited Date: 2012-12-16 07:10 pm (UTC)

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Date: 2012-12-16 07:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] therealpm.livejournal.com
Understandable, it is very near to Christmas and preventing the children from covering everything with glitter is undoubtedly a full time job.

Oh, yes, well John was rather insistent. Do let me know when would be best for me to visit.

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